Sometimes it is hard to stay positive in life, especially when you are going through a difficult period. The way we look at the future is colored by things from the past. You act on your experiences, but maybe you miss a lot of beautiful turns because you let yourself be pulled along too much by the past. That’s a shame, isn’t it? It is logical that you sometimes base your choices on events from the past, but it is not good if they block your life. Fear, anger or sadness can make you make certain choices. You lose your positive mindset and the positive energy in life. Of course, you will never be able to look at the world in a completely neutral way, because that is what we are human beings for. However, you can put yourself under a magnifying glass and look at yourself critically. Have I processed my past? Do I have regrets? Did it go the way I wanted? Do you run away from things, or do you fight them? I always say “you have to do it yourself, nobody else does it for you”. A nice life is something you have to manage yourself. A positive mindset will also help you in more difficult times. Hopefully in this article I can push you a little bit in the right direction towards a (more) positive mindset!
The past is the past
Of course, this is easier said than done, but it is not impossible. Life will never get better by itself, for that you may have to see the darkness in life once, or maybe more than once. But working towards a better life, will eventually happen in an upward spiral. Sometimes you will go back a bit, only to move on again. That’s life. Ain’t easy. The past can chase you and keep you from a bright future. How can you leave the past behind? If a lot has happened, it is important to talk about it. Sometimes talking to people around you is not enough and you need help from a psychologist or therapy. How many choices you make in life are influenced by unpleasant events from the past? What things do you no longer undertake because of difficult situations from the past? That you look at the world with a colored image, is normal. Only check yourself if you are not hindering yourself and depriving yourself of beautiful things by fear. We can’t look into the future (fortunately). Sometimes it really gets better! And how sad would it be if you deprived yourself of that opportunity?
Bring positivity back!
Of course, we need to allow positivity into our lives too! Start doing things that make you happy. What hobbies did you used to have or what have you always wanted to do? Do things that give you energy. As I wrote, things don’t get better on their own. Life is a verb. Sitting in your chair or bed grumbling that life isn’t fun isn’t going to get you anywhere. Go for a walk outside, find a friend you haven’t talked to in a long time, visit a museum, go on a pub crawl, and so on. Make a list of things that make you happy and take your time to come up with some ideas. You will see that there are many things in life that make you happy! You just have to pay attention to them and start with planning on things you like to do. Also, undertaking new things gives life some more challenge and gets you out of a rut. Challenge and goals are very important to live a beautiful life. You have something to live towards and to work on. Of course you don’t always have to work on something in life, but in the absence of positivity, challenge and fun will boost your life.
Change your mindset
People sometimes say they are pessimistic, like oh well, that’s just how I think. Why accept it if you can influence it? Changing your mindset does take some doing, but fortunately it’s not impossible. Catch yourself when a negative thought comes up. After all, the glass is half full, not half empty. And think about where the negative thought comes from. Is it perhaps coming from insecurity? Is it coming from the past? Is it coming from fear? If you can figure out where the negative thought is coming from, you can learn to understand yourself better. And as you learn to understand yourself better, it is easier to address negative thoughts. And when you catch yourself with a negative thought, transform it into a positive one. Practice makes perfect, over time your thoughts will automatically be more positive. Don’t give up, changing a mindset is a job in itself (but it’s worth it!).
Let negativity go
Let the negativity go! I always notice that people are more inclined to complain than to change anything. We prefer to stay in unhealthy relationships, we stay with our boring job with terrible employer, and we keep looking up that perpetually nagging negative friend too…. Why? Why do we do what we do? In recent years, I’ve been doing a lot of choosing what I want and don’t want in my life. I put the focus on being happy. What do I need to be happy? What brings me positivity? Of course not every friendship or relationship revolves around only positivity, life has ups and downs. But relationships that aren’t fun or toxic are better to let go of. Friendships in which you no longer recognize yourself and which have had their best time, you can sometimes better let go. Probably as you read this someone will come up that makes you think “hmm”. Negative people can affect you a lot, they can unknowingly kill your spirit. I have learned that some people are temporary in life. But beyond people, a job can also have a negative impact on you. You don’t like it anymore, the challenge is gone, no nice colleagues, no appreciation, unsympathetic employer, you name it. It is worthwhile to look for another job, give yourself that! Put your environment, job, life under a magnifying glass, where do you see structural negativity?
The little things in life
And. the most important: enjoy the little things in life! Nowadays everything has to be bigger, more luxurious and more expensive, but let’s not make ourselves happier and more positive. The little things are just so valuable. If there is one thing I have not had to learn, it is that I can enjoy the little things. I already get happy when I see my cat sleeping nicely or when I buy a pastry for myself. All those little things can make a big difference in life, so organize it! Especially on the “rut” days, cook an extra nice dinner or go to the movies or gaming with your lover in the evening.